Sit For A While
December 21, 2009, my return to work at Oregon Wine Services in Mcminnville. I first started with them back in 2003. Jeff has always been good to me. A great boss, a great company. I enjoyed my time there. I’d been preparing for years to launch full time into music, so I made a commitment with Jeff and Tim that I would work for one year this time around. If I had waited ’til I was ready, I would have waited ’til I was dead. So it was that December 22, 2010 was my final day at work.
On that morning as I drove to my job, a line started forming in my mind. I was curious what the Lord would have me do when this chapter closed. What would come next? So what I got in the car that morning was:
I’m driving through the rain and my thoughts are coming fast
I wonder if this morning might be better than my last
That’s as far as I got when I arrived at the parking lot and got out of my car. But I recognized the little tug I get in my gut when a song is about to begin, so I jotted down that line on a napkin and stuck it in my glove box to finish later.
Later happened after Christmas and New Years had rolled by. I came back to it early in January, and finished the rest of this song. I showed up with expectation. Beware the difference between expectancy and expectation. Expectancy tells me that God is going to do good things, right now. Expectation attaches specifics that may yet be disappointed.
The conversation that morning went like this:
What are we gonna do now? I’ve got all the time in the time in the world. What’s first? World Domination? Marketing and Promotion? Touring and gigging and video-making? Where do we start?
Sit for a while…
yeah, yeah, I did that. That was Christmas. That’s what holidays are for. I’m rested. I’m ready to go. What’s next?
Sit…
Ok, sure, like a day or two?
for a while…
What’s this about?
You have to learn to trust me.
I trust you
Not with everything. You trust me as long as you can see where I’m taking you. You haven’t learned to close your eyes and let go.
Seriously? Sit for a while and learn how to trust you with everything? Wait, EVERYTHING????!! EVERY-thing?
Ok, you’re the Boss…
Here is the final lyric that distilled from the conversation of that day in January of 2011. It describes my time at various jobs I understood more than I loved, and my time now at a job I love far more than I understand:
I’m driving through the rain and my thoughts are coming fast
Wonder if this morning might be better than my last
Running out of time, be to work in a minute
Looking for a window, cause I want to find you in it
And sit for a while…
Yeah, I’m driving through the rain and my thoughts are coming fast
Wonder if this morning might be better than my last
Running out of time, be to work in a minute
Looking for a window cause I want to find you in it
And sit for a while, and learn how to trust you and everything
I got to sit for a while and just learn how to trust you and everything
So now I’m pulling in to work and my thoughts get interrupted
Got to get my mind all focused and productive
Big old stack’a deadlines
Counteroffer re-signs
Conferencing the phone lines
And I’m goin’ out of my … mind
But I got to get a message to the fellas in IT
Sounded kinda harsh but it wasn’t what I mean
See this new thing they installed has just been locking up my screen
And I wonder what you’d do if it was you instead of me
Glance up at the clock and it’s 11:45
Keep my mouth shut 20 minutes there’s a chance I might survive
This is not the morning my boss would understand
Some things I cannot handle, cause I am just a man
I got to sit for a while and learn how to trust you and everything
I think I got to sit for a while and just learn how to trust you and everything
Well now my body came back from lunch but my spirit didn’t wanna
Think I saw it flying down the street around the corner
Maybe you could pick it up after I get out of my job
Reset to this morning back to where we let it off
See I’m trying to get my head around this intimacy and closeness
But it’s really new to me so I been taking smaller doses
Than your book here recommended
Hope you’re not offended
Got one life to live and I don’t really want to spend it
Following a God I cannot see
Ain’t never met you
We at least been face to face well then I never would forget you
I remember that you told me you would always have a plan
I remember that you carry universes in your hand
And I might not make my deadline, but at least I’ll understand
That you are the Omega and I am just a man
I got to sit for a while and learn how to trust you and everything
I got to sit for a while and just learn how to trust you and everything
Thanks to everyone for your overwhelming support on our Kickstarter project. Thanks to you, we were able to record the song with top-notch producers, Keith Sommers and Stephen Pettyjohn.
We filmed the Music Video Short Film for the song at locations in Sheridan and McMinnville, working with film-makers Jerry Monckton, Will Paradis and Clint Blackburn, as well as a local cast of actors from Sheridan and McMinnville.
Thanks,
Len
